March 4, 2017 Memorial Service, Highland Beach, Florida

Grandmere, first let me tell you what she was not:

  • She was not a grandmother that remembered my birthdays.
  • She was not a grandmother that came to my dance recitals.
  • She was not a grandmother that shared tea parties with me as a little girl.
  • She was not a grandmother that waved to me in the homecoming parade in 1985 in Delran, NJ.

I had a grandmother that did that.  Her name was Dorothy.  She passed in 1986 and I still miss her to this day.

Now let me tell you what Grandmere was:

  • She was the grandmother that on my wedding day, gave the most beautiful toast where she complimented Dorothy in front of 200 of our family and friends.
  • She was the grandmother who first interested me in the field of self-reliance, belief in the power of the mind, and gave me my first Wayne Dyer book that I still have to this day.
  • She was the grandmother that would send me the most beautiful hand written letters while I was in chiropractic college to keep me motivated and inspired…. letters one would think were written by a college graduate, not a woman with a 4th grade education.
  • She was the grandmother that with the love of her sewing machine decorated one apartment in New Providence, NJ; one townhouse in Somerset, NJ; one home in Friendswood, TX; one home in Ewing, NJ and in the home I reside now in Hamilton, NJ, in one week decorated our entire home including making, 32, count them 32 lined curtains.
  • She was the grandmother that told me that sex is an important part, even a symbolic part, of a good marriage.
  • She was the grandmother who told me that I had found the perfect marriage partner Steve… and as we prepare to celebrate 25 years of marriage, she was right!
  • Lastly she is the grandmother who came and stayed with us for 3 weeks, that’s right 21 continuous days with Grandmere, caring for our then newborn son, Steven, while I finished my last trimester in chiropractic college. While there and caring for Steven, a 2 month old, she accomplished the following:  She decorated our kitchen, living room, dining room, office, 4 bedrooms; recovered an entire couch (who does that?); cooked 21 dinners;  asked me if I had any ‘rabeet’ aka rabit in the freezer to cook for dinner one night as if asking me if I had any milk; and on her last morning with us while I took a couple classes before taking her back to the airport she emptied every morsel of food I had in the pantry, refrigerator and freezer and cooked a dozen pre-made meals…. including home-made dumplings, with yeast to boot!

On the last day I was to see Grandmere, 7 weeks before she passed, as I kissed her on the forehead and left her room, she said and I quote, “Denise, remember every adversity carries with it the seed of greater benefit.”  Of course I had to look it up when I got home, a quote by Napoleon Hill.

Grandmere no doubt you had many adversities in your life.  But if my count is correct you have 6 seeds, 15 grandseeds, and 12 great grandseeds with more to come.

That’s a lot of seed that you have planted.  We hope to honor your life and your legacy and all the amazing things you taught us by becoming the fine, and ripe, and loving, and kind, and because “we don’t do ugly”, a favorite quote you often recited about your family, beautiful fruits of your labor.

Love, your granddaughter, Denise